Toddler Tuesday: The Naptime from Hell

Tuesday Toddler Update:

Warning: If you were at all grossed out by my post on potty training you should not read this one.  It gets worse.

Nap time sucks now.  It’s never really sucked like this before.  Today was day five of total suckage.  This is mostly our fault.  We are trying to get LP off of diapers for nap time.  Our plan was to put his potty in his room and tell him he could use it during nap time.  This worked day one.  It no longer works.  Here is how naptime goes now:

1:20: LP goes potty before nap time.  Then we do the whole get in pjs, read a story, brush teeth, get tucked in, etc.  Except now he is not wearing a diaper – he is in underwear!  Yay!  Good for us – our toddler will get potty trained through the night in no time!  Naptime is just step 1!

1:30: We finish with story time.  Time for hugs and kisses and getting tucked in.  LP asks Dad to lie down in bed with him for a minute.  He does.

1:32: We stand at the door to blow kisses.  LP blows kisses and asks for more hugs.  We say we will have more hug time after his nap is done.

1:32.05: We start to close the door.  LP jumps up and says “gotta pee!”  He scurries over to the potty.  We tell him “that is fine, but Mommy and Daddy are closing the door.  We say, “You can call us if you poop and need to be wiped.  Otherwise finish peeing and then go back to bed.”

Want to guess what happens next?

1:33: We close the door.  LP shouts “I’m POOPING!!  NEED WIPE”  We go back in, wipe him, flush the poop, and put him back in bed.  He asks for more hugs and kisses.  After one more hug and kiss, we leave.  We get to the door.  He says “cuddle more!”  We say “No, it’s time for your nap.”  He jumps up “Need to poop!”  We leave again.

1:35: Dad goes back in for another wipe and flush.  Yes, LP had pooped again.  Dad explains to LP that he should wait until he is done pooping for real before he calls us in again.  He needs to get all the poop out of his system first.  Dad goes to leave.  Then there is a repeat of the 1:32 and 1:33 exit show, and Dad leaves with LP sitting on the potty.

1:37: Dad is over it.  He goes outside to do yard work.  Mom camps out upstairs to await the next wipe request.

1:50: There is silence.  No poop announcements.  No crying.  “Maybe LP went back to bed and fell asleep” Mom thinks.  “Perhaps I shall get to write a blog post, or reply to an e-mail, or start dinner!”  Mom starts reviewing her lengthy to-do list.

1:55: “MAMA!!  POOP!!  NEED WIPE!!”

2:00: After praise for waiting until the pooping was done before calling for a wipe, a discussion about how poop moves from our tummies and then on out, and after a “final” hug and kiss, LP is in bed, calm, with his stuffed animals.  Mom closes the door with him still in bed – success!

2:02: “Mama?  Need pee!  Need poop!”

2:30: LP has not called for anything since I told him to go sit on the potty at 2:02.  Theoretically he should only call for me if he pooped and needs a wipe.  He has been quiet for almost 1/2 an hour.  Either he gave up and finally went to bed, or he has been sitting on the potty for thirty minutes.  No sane person would just sit on the potty for thirty minutes to avoid a nap!

2:40: LP says “MAMA!  NEED WIPE.”  Mama thinks “You’ve got to be f-ing kidding me.”

2:42:  There was no poo.  There was no pee.  My child is crazy.  I am crazy.  I spend way to much of my life dealing with poo and poo related stubbornness.  I leave the room and tell LP that I’m not coming back in until his nap is done (which is at 3:15).  I make the mistake of saying that he could spend that time in bed or on the potty “for all I care.”  Oops.

3:15: Mom peeks into the room to see if LP is sleeping.  He is on the potty.  Just sitting, chillin’ on the potty.  Nap time is over.  LP 1, Mom 0.  Re-match tomorrow.

Notes from the Year of Family

Vegan Goodness:
Today we ate . . .

  • Breakfast: Green smoothies for Dad and LP.  Then Mom and LP had some oatmeal!
  • We all snacked on pita chips and hummus
  • Lunch: Leftover curry rice and cholent.  Making room in the fridge for Thanksgiving leftovers!
  • Dinner: Lasagna – oops, so much for our fridge room!
  • Mom and Dad finished off the chocolate chip shortbread cookies for dessert.

Money Matters:

Today we spent the following:

  • $24.41 for another Whole Foods run.  Dad needed more stuff for his Thanksgiving Seitan Roast, and we also wanted to stock up on some more soymilk.
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6 thoughts on “Toddler Tuesday: The Naptime from Hell

  1. Hey, I went through something kind of similar with the little boy I used to baby sit. He ultimately just needed a different nap avoidance device. What ended up working (and garnering me a raise) was leaving him in bed with a family photo album, so he had the option of quietly flipping through pages and looking at pictures while he laid or sat in bed. Half the time he ended up totally skipping the nap and just looking at photos quietly the entire time, but the rest of the time he’d conk out and I’d find him drooling on the album. So not a total win, but increases odds in your favor! Good luck!

    1. Such a good idea! Thank you! I thought I was caving today when I brought him books and told him he could read or sleep but he wasn’t allowed to leave is his room (the potty is now in the bathroom across the hall). I just checked – he is passed out! Your comment made me feel way better about doing this, and I love the family album idea! I think I’ll see if he wants that instead tomorrow – he wasn’t super keen on the animal books. I can totally see how you got a raise – want to come live in my house for a week or so? 😉

      1. Lol, I totally enjoy that sort of thing, would seriously consider. Just stayed with a friend and her two babies for a week over the summer, I loved it. I’m glad it worked for you!!

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